Space Clown Review!
Hey everyone, I’m back! Sorry about the absence of a review last week, there were personal things going on in both mine and man-things lifes, so we had to skip it. But now we’re back! And boy do we have quite the film for you guys for the final movie of space month, space clown! This is the most recent film in space month, being released only a few years ago in 2016, and it is the one I have the most to talk about, so let’s stop wasting time and get into this bad boy!
The film begins with our main character, Graham, looking at his camera and just kinda, talking to it. Yep, this is also a found footage movie! This is immediately followed by a clown parody of NWA straight outta Compton. I immediately had flashbacks to Leprechaun 6, Back 2 Tha Hood. This is also how I found out that this film is probably a farce, which took me by surprise because on IMDB it’s not listed as a comedy, which it probably should be because, yeah it’s a farce.
ANYWAYS after that, we get some exposition, Graham’s girlfriend Jordann is going to a band gig tonight, and during that same night there’s supposed to be a meteor shower, which Graham is gonna film. That night he’s outside alone when suddenly a green light smashes into his guest, house? Not a guest room a whole other house meant for guests. I wonder what the guy who made this film does for a living to afford such a house.
After exploring the guest house all he finds is one of those clown horns with a little squeeze ball on the end. He calls up his friend Jeff to hang out tonight, but instead he gets his gay neighbor Brian. They say he’s gay, then we hear him complain for a bit about all the light, but like, did he not know that there was a meteor shower tonight? Those tend to cause a little light.
After Brian leaves, Jeff shows up and once again reiterated that Brian is gay. I bring this up because it’s so weird that they bring it up twice and then never again, it’s almost like they’re setting something up for it to never pay off. I digress, so Jeff and Graham play some NES hockey for a bit, then Graham passes out. Jeff then gets kidnapped and tied up by the space clown, whos hiding out in Graham’s guest house!
He jokes around with Jeff for a bit, then murders him to fuel his crashed space ship because apparently, that’s how space clowns power their ships. He then shits out another human and uses a cheese grater to kill him. Shortly after Graham goes outside to try and find Jeff, since he’s missing, and runs into Brain again, who says the same thing as before. We also see space clown is following him. Eventually, Jordann gets back just as Graham finds the chopped up remains of Jeff! But when he tries to show Jordann, she can’t see it. Is Graham perhaps just insane? Or maybe it’s just space clown trickery! Find out later on in the review!
Fun fact, the characters all have the same names as their actors, so this tells me that this was just a couple of friends who had an idea for a movie and then just made it, and after a quick look at their filmography on imdb, yeah no that’s pretty much the case. Graham is apparently an actual actor, appearing in multiple films before and since, and Jeff went on to become a professional editor on television, working on shows like Project Blue Book and Shades of Blue.
But enough about the actors, it’s time for characters, and there’s not all that much to talk about. Why do you think I took half the segment talking about the actors other works? Graham is our relatable good main character, Jeff is a partying ass, Brian is a regular ass, but space clown is actually not just generic evil clown. His acting pretty much just comes across as someone who doesn’t wanna be there, like it’s just his job, and it kinda works for the humor. Speaking of!
The comedy in this film is actually not terrible. It actually made me laugh quite a bit, mainly because of the fact that the clown just wants to fucking go home. It’s not like, say, killer clowns from outer space, where the clown aliens come down to earth on purpose, like I said he just crashed there. The movie also knows that it’s plot is stupid, and space clown even makes a few 4th wall jokes, which shows that it’s not taking itself seriously, which is good! All around, it’s jokes are pretty juvenile and don’t always land, but they still work most of the time.
So, Jordan does the thing that most people would do when their significant other starts talking about murderous space clowns, and thinks that they’re crazy. They go to sleep, and in their sleep space clown sneaks in and injects Jordann with some clown juices, turning her into a mime version of Harley Quinn. I’m not sure if this is meant to be sexy or not, I know some people are into clowns like that, I’m not, aside from Tara Strong’s harley quinn, but hey who isn’t.
Getting away from that topic as fast as possible before things get awkward, Graham is awakened and gets chased down by Jordann and Space Clown. He gets in his car and picks up Brian, but they get caught again and are put on Space Clowns space clown ship. Space Clown murders Brian, then rips off Grahams balls for a joke.
Space Clown also clarifies to Graham that he and Jordann are fucking, just to rub more salt in the wound, when suddenly Graham manages to escape and jumps out of the ship! Somehow Space Clown and Jordann stay in the ship, and Graham manages to survive his drop back to earth, but he is burned to a crisp. Graham uses his final words to warn the earth that Space Clown and Jordann are gonna come back with the entirety of Space Clown Planet, and the final shot seems to prove that as Space clown jumps out of nowhere. The End!
Well well well, I certainly wasn’t expecting this. I thought I was just gonna see a shitty boring film that rips off killer clowns from outer space, but I actually saw something somewhat entertaining. The film knows it’s dumb and makes no pretense about the contrary. So, yeah I guess if you want a fun stupid horror movie, then feel free to check this one out if ya want.
Oh yeah, I almost forgot. I’m sure you guys have been eagerly awaiting the answer of the murder mystery, given just how many of you entered to win. Well despite the fact no one actually entered, I feel like I’m obligated to answer who the murderers are. So here we go!
The murderers were both the soviets, the german, and the american all killed someone! Allow me to explain:
So, the gay german killed the russian lady in order to stop her from telling everyone he’s gay. This is the 80s after all so that’s reasonable. Then the russian guy killed the gay german since he knew that he killed the russian lady. Then the canadian guy died because the russian girl poisoned his asthma with the cyanide to stop anyone from finding out he got her pregnant. Then in the coup, the american killed the russian guy. The Dane, Italian, Brit, and american lady never killed anyone, and the american man goes free since it was self defense.
Well there’s the answer. No one wins anything because no one entered. Ah well, hope you guys enjoyed the review, I’ll see ya next week!