Gremlins 2 Review!
Right, well, Ghostbusters 2016 was quite the shit show of a movie, so today we’re going to need to even things out with an actually good film. Now first, why aren’t we doing the first movie? Simple, ya gotta save that for the christmas special, and also, this is news to me, a lot of people didn’t know this was a movie. So I guess I’m here to teach you guys whats up, so on with the review!
The film takes place some time after the events of the first gremlins. Billy and Kate are now living together in the big apple, working at the high tech Clamp Industries building. Daniel Clamp, a man who could presumably be president now, is trying to build a new high tech expansion to china town, however the shop from the original store refuses to sell land. Fortunately for the plot, the old man dies, and the land goes to clamp, and so does Gizmo.
After being taken to the genetics lab inside the Clamp building, Gizmo is threatened to be dissected. However, a delivery man hears Gizmos iconic whistle, and while on his way out, Billy hears it to, and learns where Gizmo is. He saves him and puts him in his cabinet, when suddenly Clamp shows up and starts complimenting Billys design for the chinatown district. This gets the attention of his sexy boss Marla, and she basically forces him into a date while Billy tells Kate to go to his office and get Gizmo.
Meanwhile, back in the Clamp building, Gizmo escapes his cabinet prison and accidently gets wet, producing 4 other gremlins which I just found out had names. Daffy, Lenny, George, and their leader Mohawk. They trap Gizmo in the vents, and start eating food AFTER MIDNIGHT! But first, Kate returns to billys office and gets the wrong mogwai, Daffy. After Billy finds out she has the wrong guy, and they realize it might already be too late. After a cameo by the Futtermans, where they make a few jokes that have not aged well, Billy tries to break in, but is instead arrested.
The next day, Billy and Kate run into the building telling everyone about what’s happening, and just in time too as the Mogwai have turned into Gremlins, and worse, they’ve multiplied. The gremlins begin terrorizing everyone, and Gizmo, for some reason, is singled out by Mohawk, who proceeds to torture the poor little guy. After a few more antics, the gremlins get into the genetics lab, and start changing into all sorts of forms, these include a smart gremlin, an electricity gremlin, a female gremlin, a bat gremlin who is also sun proof, and most badass of all, a spider gremlin.
Billy makes his way to Clamps office and tells Clamp what’s going on and tells him his plan, to make the gremlins think its night outside in order to lure them to the lobby, then melt them with the sunlight coming through all the glass. Clamp goes through his secret exit, which Futterman uses to get back into the building after killing the bat gremlin. Suddenly the gremlins stop the film and hulk hogan has to come up to the projector booth and make them play it again. No really that, that happens it’s amazing.
The characters in this film are, basic, but fine. There is a character that isn’t necessary to the plot but they still go through an arc that I’ll talk about now. First off there’s Fred, someone who hosts horror movie nights on the Clamp tv network. Though he aspired to be a news anchor. When the gremlins attack, he seizes his opportunity, and has quite a few moments showing him progressing from not knowing what the hell he’s talking about to being a rather interesting news anchor reporting on the events.
Now as for the rest of the characters they’re fine, Billy knows what’s going on but no one will listen to him, Kate, as well as Mr.Futterman, have been traumatized by the events of the first film, and Gizmo is the cute little guy who will eventually fight back but we’re not there yet. The acting is actually pretty good, and of course we got Christopher Lee and Hulk Hogan hamming it up, which are both lovely. The characters are alright, but they’re not the star of the show. The real star is…
Good lord these effects are beautiful! Done by the academy award winner Rick Baker, this movie shows off just how great practical effects can look when in the right hands. Using a mix of puppets, animatronics, and even some stop motion, the gremlins and mogwai really feel alive in this film. A clever trick they used in this film that they couldn’t in the original was close ups, for which they built Gizmo at multiple different scales, from the small puppet they used originally to a giant face, they could make gizmo look more expressive than they ever could in Gremlins.
The gremlin designs are also a lot more varied now, they’re all sorts of different colors aside from just green, and as I said before they consume genetic material, thus transforming them into a hybrid of a gremlin and whatever they ate. And I’m gonna say it again, the spider gremlin is absolutely badass. Though, as was pointed out to me, they can sometimes look like they’re just, toys. Really oversized toys, but toys nonetheless. Though honestly for the most part they are a wonderful example of why practical effects, in my mind, will always look better than CG.
After finally having enough of Mohawks torture, Gizmo breaks out when he’s off turning into the spider gremlin. In the meantime, Marla finally returns to the film and gets caught in one of Mohawks webs. Kate makes it to her in time to save her, and at the same time Mr.Futterman saves Billy from a gremlin dentist, who I do not believe actually went to dentistry school. Mohawk appears in front of the girls, who try and horribly fail to get away, but gizmo gets there just in time and sets the fucker on fire! A badass death for a badass creature.
After everyone is reunited, they all go to the lobby in order to watch them all die in the sun. However bad luck for them, as the gremlins are singing their incredibly choreographed musical number, a freak storm appears and blocks up the sun. All seems to be over, until Billy has an idea. They soak the gremlins in water and use the electric gremlin to fry them all! All the gremlins die, Billys architecture plans for a small town are put into effect because clamp loves them so much, and someone fucks the lady gremlin. The end!
Ah, it’s refreshing to see a good movie for once. And this film really is good, though sadly it didn’t do so great at the box office, mainly because it came out 6 years after Gremlins did. Oops. Ah well, they took their time to lovingly craft a film with a simple but enjoyable plot, great characters, absolutely beautiful effects, and in the end created something truly special.
People have been throwing around the idea for a gremlins 3 for nearly decades now, and over and over we hear about it being confirmed and other news, and I’d be happy to see these faces again one last time. If a long wait is what I need to get good sequels, I think we’re all willing to wait a good 30 years for a quality sequel.