Airbud Spikes Back Review.
Who doesn’t love dogs? Nobody! Even Hitler loved dogs, meaning if you don’t love dogs you’re worse than Hitler. Back in the 90’s and early 2000’s, Hollywood knew this, and milked the shit out of it. There are were SO many dog movies, and probably one of the most popular was Air Bud. For the unaware, Air Bud is a movie about a dog who can play basketball, and it has a shit ton of sequels. This is one of the last, and most likely the worst of the series, so CLEARLY this is the one I wanted to watch! So let’s pick the worst of the poisons and take a swig of it like a hillbilly with a jug of whisky!
This film begins with a child who can definitely act for sure. He’s messing around with air bud, training him for some kind of event, but Air Bud suddenly runs off in order to meet his older female master on her last day of school. Sadly however her best friend is moving to california the next day. I don’t know if any of these characters are characters in the other air bud films, but if they are I guess the kids that have been following the whole series might have found this intro a bit depressing.
While all that is happening, we watch two bumbling thieves trying to steal a very valuable gem. They eventually devise that they’d need to get a dog to get through the security, and these two plotlines collide when we see the event the kids been training air bud for, a dog show at a local carnival. Shortly after that, it’s established that the girl can go to california if she can raise the money. Then randomly the parents go out on some random vacation for some reason, and leave the kids under the care of their grandma and her bird.
After that we see a teenage boy, sporting the stylish jew-fro, moved into the friends house. After a montage of the girl dogsitting for money, the bird gets out and all the dogs shes watching chase after said bird, destroy a bunch of shit, and in the end she has to lose all her money. Well what the fuck was the point of that!? Why waste so much time, seriously they waste like 20 minutes on this, to something that’s completely useless in the long run! Urg whatever, what’s next.
So after a bit of sulking and sadness because all is lost, suddenly jew-fro brings up the fact that he likes volleyball and there’s a tournament with the grand prize being a trip to California! How convenient! So they decide to have the girl join the volleyball team. Meanwhile, the crooks catch the bird, and decide to use the bird as bait in order to catch air bud. Keep in mind we are over 40 minutes in by now and air bud has yet to play volleyball.
Okay so I’ve been avoiding talking about it, I could tell you guys about how the characters are all bland and going through the motions, and how all the acting is alright and build this up, but screw it man let’s just jump right in, the little boys acting in this film is the worst acting I have ever seen in any of the movies we’ve done so far! I mean, for the love of god, there is not one single emotion in this kids voice! He has no volume control whatsoever, all of his lines are either him screaming at the top of his lungs or whispering, it sounds like they pulled this kid off the street, told him to say stuff into a camera, and that was it.
If I was smart enough to know how to rip files directly off dvds I’d make a video to show you guys what I mean, but for now, please just take my word for it. Even for a kid, even for a kid in the early 2000’s, this is truly absolutely horrendous acting!
So after some training, we find out that one of the girls on the team is moving, so who will they get to replace her? Yes! Finally, 56 minutes into this nearly hour and a half long movie, we finally have the main draw of this film, a dog playing volleyball! But wait! After a short montage, air bud is finally successfully kidnapped by the bad guys, and on the day of the big last game of the tournament! Oh no! Well don’t worry because airbud beats these guys in like, 5 minutes. Air bud wins the tournament, everyone goes to california, and we get a came from someone who was probably a famous volleyball player at the time, the end!
Wow this film is a mess. Like really, I’ve tried my damnedest to make this as short and condensed as possible, and yes, there are some subplots I had to take out of this review because they have absolutely nothing to do with the film. This film is so bad it’s worth LESS than the film we did last week, since I also got this film at a dollar store, but this time in a four pack! Yeah, this film is worth 25 cents. I suggest you ignore this one, and allow air bud to only be remembered for being a wacky dog who played basketball, instead of a cash cow that was milked dry, then had it’s offspring milked even dryer in the buddies series. Will we ever do one of their movies? Yes.